A Day in the Facebook Life of a Desperate Single Guy

6:15 am: Soy latte time, just a banana with, since I am spinning my ass off after working for the man! Mr. Goldman and Mr. Sachs, if ya feel me! — at Starbucks

10:38 am: Rockin’ that Pinkberry! All I am eating today because I want my slim J BRANDs to look tight, and by that I don’t mean tight!! Gotta get the 5 series down to the shop for some TLC!

12:18 pm: Instead of eating lunch, I just calculated my daily salary, and it’s huge! Made a reservation for two at Gary Danko, who’s the lucky lady gonna be?

6:49 pm: I don’t know the name of this spot, but talk about an IN crowd! Glad I wore the Rolex, not the Breitling! One more neat Macallan and I will be smooth!

10:09 pm: My OkCupid account is blowin’ up! So many ladies, so little time!

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